08.11.09
Dear Ashden: Month Twenty Three
Dear Ash,
You’re 23-months old today and officially a “big boy,” or so you say. If anyone dares call you a “little boy” or a “baby” you will quickly correct us, that NO, you are a BIG BOY. Okay, okay, Big Boy, I apologize!
This month has been fun! We’ve spent a LOT of time outside, weekends as a family at the beach, Saturdays at the playground and/or lake with your dad, riding your tricycle around the neighbourhood, playing in the backyard while we barbque, you name it, we’ve really been enjoying the outdoors as summer has finally hit. You love the beach, going up to your waist in the water and playing with the sand. You’re not a fan of actually swimming, even though we’ve exposed you to lots of pools in your life, but it’ll come. Your dad and I are both water babies, so it’ll come. I’m not pressuring you.
You’re completely potty trained now, at home, as long as you don’t have a diaper (or any other bottoms) on. This is huge! You will go to the potty by yourself if you feel the need to- you’ll just tell me, “no peeing on the floor” or “need to poop” or sometimes I’ll hear you from the other room that “Ash is peeing on the green potty!” and I won’t need to help you or anything, you’ll just come back to me and say, “all done” or “peed on the potty!” If you’re bottomless, there’s never, ever an accident. It’s fantastic and I’m so proud of you. You’ve even started really asking for the potty at school, rather than just going in your diaper, and your teachers are also proud of you (and thrilled, I imagine, that they don’t have as many poopy diapers to clean up).
You started to love to “sing” this month, even if there’s no tune to go along with your songs- you like to sing Baa Baa Black Sheep, Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star and your ABCs especially. You’re great with remembering most of the words, in order, and the same goes with the alphabet. Sometimes you get mixed up and even stick some numbers and random sounds in there, but often times you get it almost 100% correct!
Something fantastic happened this month that really was straight out of left field and completely caught me off guard: you started being able to fall asleep without me being there. One night, after nursing you as usual, you didn’t fall asleep and I didn’t want to lay in the dark with you for any longer, so I told you I was going to leave and that it was time to go to sleep and I’d see you soon. I kissed you on the forehead and left the room. And you didn’t complain. Not a peep. And a few minutes later I went in and there you were, asleep.
So we tried it the next night. I nursed you like usual, said goodnight and then got up to leave. You asked for another cuddle, but I said it was time to go to sleep and then I left the room. No complaining again, and you fell asleep on your own! We’ve done it this way most nights (Friday and Saturday nights are the hardest, after a week of not seeing me as much as you’d like, you’re pretty clingy and want lots and lots and lots of cuddles) for the past two weeks, and it’s fantastic. Not only is it great to see you break the habit of needing a boob in your mouth to go to sleep (giving me hope for whenever you want to stop nursing), but it’s nice to see you be a bit more independent at nighttime and it allows me a bit more time alone in the evenings too.
That’s not all, on the sleep front… there was one day, mid-way through this month, that you only had a 30-minute nap and asked to go to bed (“milk, in bed”) early- around 6:30pm, and much to my surprise, you SLEPT THROUGH THE NIGHT. I came to bed at 11ish, and nursed you in your sleep (seeing as I’m addicted to that hormonal rush that nursing gives me, otherwise I can’t fall asleep), and I woke up with a jolt at 5am, made sure you were still breathing and then I fell back to sleep. I woke up at 7:11, with you half on your mattress and half on ours, and you were STILL SLEEPING. I had to wake you up! It hasn’t happened since, but by god, it was amazing.
You’ve been nursing less at night recently, only once at 11 (that’s my choosing), and usually only once around 4:30 or 5am. You actually had me in a bit of a panic there for about a week, thinking you were losing interest- you don’t nurse during the day and because you don’t need me to fall asleep anymore and cut down dramatically on your nursing at night, I thought you might be done nursing all together soon… but then you changed it up again and are as interested as ever. My goal is two years, as it always has been, and as long as we make it to your second birthday, I’ll be happy.
Your sentences are becoming more complete, you started speaking in the first person instead of the third and you talk ALL THE TIME. ALLLLLLLLLL THEEEEEEEEEE TIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEE. It makes me realize how much you actually see, how much you can remember, how much of a complete and utter SPONGE your brain is. It’s absolutely fascinating to watch. I love seeing you learn. I love being surprised that you remembered a word we taught you weeks ago and haven’t used since- having it pop up in normal conversation, as if we’ve been practicing it- it’s amazing.
We bought you a tricycle a couple of months ago, and you’ve finally gotten enough strength in your legs to ride it. When you first got it, you’d push it with your feet on the ground, but now you can ride like you’re supposed to. You go around the house every day, you ride it to the playground and to visit me at work. You’re growing up! Soon it will be time for a real bicycle with training wheels.
Ash at Nana’s from Gillian Hyde on Vimeo.
This may be later than some kids, but this month your imagination has started to explode. Though you’ve played with cars on the couch and trains on their tracks, you’ve never really acted out and verbalized imaginative things until this month. I’m sure that when you drive your cars on the couch that you’re enacting some kind of story in your mind, but we don’t hear car noises or anything coming from you… but this month when we’ve been reading the same books we’ve read for your entire life, you’ve suddenly started “eating” the food in the Hungry, Hungry Caterpillar, or “throwing” the balls in the pictures, or “flying” the airplanes that you see. I can’t wait to see this part of you flourish, as I’m sure it will.
This has been a fantastic month. We’ve had a lot of fun together, sometimes just you and I, sometimes just you and your dad, and sometimes the three of us as a family.
I know I say this every month, but I can’t help it: You’re one incredibly special person, one who makes my eyes water just at the thought of how much I love you. I love writing these monthly newsletters because it makes me realize how far you’ve come in such a short period of time. I’m glad I’ve documented it all, mostly because it makes me realize how quickly you change and it really makes me appreciate you who are NOW, since I know by next week you’ll be a slightly different version than you were today. You’re so smart and so special and I feel so lucky to be your mom. Thank you for showing me what real love feels like.
Love,
Mama